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New Arsenal Boss in 2012

An Astrological Perspective

22 September, 2011 10:00 21 comments
New Arsenal Boss in 2012

Arsene: Written in the stars?

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I’m as disappointed as everyone else about the decline in fortune at Arsenal. Unlike many Arsenal supporters however, I’m not surprised by events taking place. The reason for Arsene Wenger’s run of bad luck and poor judgement is largely due to astrological factors. In fact, at a Q&A session some months ago, a supporter referred to Arsene Wenger, using a quote from Shakespeare:

There is a tide in the affairs of men....

The implication being that fortune is something that ebbs and flows in time.

During Shakespeare’s time, there was widespread acceptance of the cyclical nature of good & bad fortune and its intimate connection with the study of the heavens. Astrologers of the past took the view that the birth-chart (Nativity) of a King, a chief, a commander or other type of leader was of primary importance in determining the fortunes of a nation, a city, an army etc. If the King was being adversely affected by the planets, it followed that developments within his nation would, by and large, be subject to similar misfortune (and vice versa).

In relation to Arsene Wenger, the leader of Arsenal Football Club, it’s clear that he is suffering from the effects of adverse planetary influences. Planet Saturn (called the Greater Malefic by the ancients) has been causing trouble since at least September 2008. During this cycle of adversity, it is difficult to achieve the success desired. It’s a time of frustration, set-backs and sometimes poor health. Arsene Wenger’s misfortune is directly reflected in the team which he leads. This cycle reaches critical points at the end of December2011/beginning of January 2012 and again in March 2012.

It is for this reason that I think it unlikely Arsene Wenger will still be in charge of Arsenal after the close of the January transfer window. However, if he chooses to stay (or is given the chance), he might start to regain his old form once Saturn’s influence decreases (from April/May 2012). Unfortunately, this might be too late in terms of progress for the club. Our best bet, therefore, is a new manager as soon as possible. I believe that our season can be revitalised and will not be the total write off that some have suggested. I’m still hoping and believing in a top 4 finish.

Twitter@AstrologerBDunn

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21
comments

  1. Richard Ansell

    Sep 23, 2011, 8:46 #13215

    Wenger is certainly on another planet!

  2. Ronster

    Sep 22, 2011, 22:23 #13213

    Wenger will eventually get his comeuppance for arrogantly not thinking of the bigger picture by refusing to pick the brains of someone like Don Howe,an outstanding coaching legend for Arsenal and England.The Don is now in his seventies but still running coaching sessions around the country.Remember this man was the brains behind Arsenal's success in the late 60s and early 70s and later oversaw the development of the likes of Adams,Rocastle, Merson and Thomas.Wenger is running scared that he's been found out.He's allowing his ego to run down the club and this sickens me to the core!

  3. GoonerGoal!

    Sep 22, 2011, 21:52 #13212

    Born under a bad sign? "If it wasn't for bad luck,I wouldn't have no luck at all..."

  4. win AFC

    Sep 22, 2011, 19:02 #13210

    With or without Wenger i believe Arsenal will win silverware this season. No its not a joke

  5. Herts Gooner

    Sep 22, 2011, 18:21 #13209

    I can see Arsene moving into the Director of Football roll next year, with a new manager coming in. I read it in the tea leaves...

  6. Ron

    Sep 22, 2011, 17:06 #13207

    Paul Jewell has a moon shaped head and Roy Keane looks and behaves like hes from another planetry system. We could conceivably end up with either if Arsene got his cards in January. Good light hearted post though. As the guy above says,i'd wager its better than Sky Sports offerings and i dont subscribe.

  7. mandy dodd

    Sep 22, 2011, 16:28 #13206

    Interesting - who would the stars indicate is an ideal replacement?

  8. Theo's Underpants Designer

    Sep 22, 2011, 16:15 #13205

    Don't believe in astrology myself but the above is about as plausible - if not more so - than some of the rubbish coming out of the mouths of Wenger, Gazidis and Hill Wood, never mind the claptrap that comes from the computer of Mandy Dodd, PPP and GoonerRon!!

  9. Ronster

    Sep 22, 2011, 15:28 #13204

    Gazidis('bottom' left)telling Wenger:''Pull up your trousers Arse-ne,they can see Uranus....'' :-)

  10. astropup

    Sep 22, 2011, 15:26 #13203

    Saturn actually puts immoveable blocks in the way to show where your blind spots and stupidity are its nothing to do with luck, health or any of that - it is just about being found out, and you are correct, if he does not have a massive wake up, he will be sacked in Jan / Feb 2012

  11. Website Admin

    Sep 22, 2011, 15:16 #13201

    This is a very different piece to what we usually run on the site and I understand it won't be to everyone's liking. By all means disagree with the views expressed , but if you can't do it respectfully then I'd suggest you don't waste your time as they probably won't make it past the moderators.

  12. CD

    Sep 22, 2011, 15:06 #13200

    @Andy Kelly God I hope you are right, and even if Wenger were to remain in situ, I would have 100% confidence that Usmanov and Dein would change our transfer policy and if need be enforce quality experienced players upon Wenger, as well as some quality defensive coaches and a new medical team. Having said that I would still prefer a new manager, because Wenger has broken a bond of trust with us, with his endless lies, talking down to us, and just generally being way to smug.

  13. TheFonz

    Sep 22, 2011, 15:00 #13198

    Astrology and star signs is a complete load of absolute rubbish based on no proof or fact. Why does this site continue to plummit into the realms of lunacy and idiocy and why do you feel this has any relevance to football!!!Although, compared to the usual tabloid junk that is put up by the usual pub-fan contributors it is a more entertaining and intelligent read!

  14. booodz

    Sep 22, 2011, 14:56 #13197

    In Arsene we trust, you think we are performing bad now?! Wait till we get a new boss, we wont get past 7th place

  15. Seven Kings Gunner

    Sep 22, 2011, 14:55 #13196

    More to do I am afraid with sticking with players who are not good enough. A few years back all we needed was a goalkeeper and a CB not a "stargazer" - now it is so far gone no one really knows where to start to repair the damage.

  16. Freddy Koigi

    Sep 22, 2011, 14:53 #13195

    Arsenal needs Wenger, but Arsenal doesn't need Peter Hill-Wood. The guy who has tied Arsenal's legs all the way from the Boardroom to the Pitch. I hope you didn't miss this quote from Owen Coyle ""I wouldn't be surprised. Arsene's always said he's a big admirer of Gary Cahill and ultimately the clubs never reached a fee - certainly the two chairman never got to a fee they felt was agreeable". It is not Wenger's job to buy and he has identified very good players only to be denied the money and left looking for left overs.

  17. GaryFootscrayAustralia

    Sep 22, 2011, 14:52 #13194

    Knock this piece if you want, but it still makes more sense than anything Th* S*n or Sk* Sp*rt have come out with, and plenty of people still pay money to read or watch that rubbish...

  18. I see

    Sep 22, 2011, 14:42 #13192

    so rather than chanting 'spend some f-----g money' we should chant- 'read some f-----g horoscopes'?

  19. CD

    Sep 22, 2011, 14:37 #13191

    What a load of tosh. Don't tell me that Fergie's astrological signs have been positive for the last circa 18 years, but somehow not any of the other Premier league managers have had this long period of benefit from the stars. This is clutching at staws at best, because the reason Wenger is in the position he is now in, is because of his blind, obstinate, stubborn, deluded methods which we have gone over a thousand times already, and nothing whatsoever to do with any astrological hocus pocus. I think all Arsenal supporters whether pro or anti Wenger will unite on this article, as the most ridiculous contribution ever.

  20. Dav

    Sep 22, 2011, 14:25 #13190

    >>It is for this reason that I think it unlikely Arsene Wenger will still be in charge of Arsenal after the close of the January transfer window.<< what a pile of poo! Do you really think Arsenal would be stupid enough to sack Wenger mid season?

  21. Andy Kelly

    Sep 22, 2011, 14:23 #13189

    We will have a new boss in 2012 except it will be in the boardroom and not the training staff. Usmanov now needs less than 600 shares to mount a takeover for the club. Silent Stan will be able to make 20% on the shares he bought earlier this year and 40% on the shares he bought prior to this. Can't see him turning that down in the current economic climate. The thing is, will Usmanov bring Dein in?