If I were a rich man...

…if I were a wealthy man!



If I were a rich man...

Daidle deedle daidle daidle daidle deedle daidle dum.


Arsène Wenger is obviously passionate about football after all, He has spent his entire life working in, talking about, playing or thinking about football. He is a borderline obsessive student of the game that we all love so dearly and le professeur has spent around 9,861 days working in football management, but I'm starting to believe that he also harbours a secret obsessive passion for 1960s musical theatre as well...

How else can we explain this latest whimsical number from our own Arsène "Tevye" Wenger? In a recent interview with the Sun newspaper Arsène apparently got a bit carried away, burst into song and sounded just liked the character "Tevye" from Fiddler on the Roof when he sang, in his beautiful continental accent, ‘If I had the money, I'd put it on Neymar,’ ‘You can't say that Neymar is Pele as he had won the World Cup by the age of 17.’ ‘He has the potential to be one of the future great strikers but, at the moment, there's a big difference between the Brazilian league and a European league.’

‘If I had the money, (Daidle deedle daidle daidle daidle deedle daidle dum) I'd put it on Neymar.’ (‘All day long I'd biddy-biddy-bum….if I were a wealthy man!’)

I don't know about you, fellow Gooners, but I was under the impression that Arsène Wenger did have money to spend in the transfer market but was choosing, rather than being forced, to be frugal. This statement from the Arsenal manager seems to suggest otherwise. Are we as fans expected to read his latest comments to the press as a thinly-veiled plea for cash to spend in January from the board? Or is this just a flippant comment about a player whom Arsène Wenger considers safe to discuss because he views him as ridiculously unobtainable due to the much reported interest in him from clubs such as Real Madrid and Barcelona?

Whilst, in all seriousness, the chances of us Gooners seeing a huge-name signing like Neymar gracing the pitch at Ashburton Grove anytime soon is extremely unlikely, we, as fans who care deeply about the future of our club, should take a long hard look at how Arsenal could and should be thinking about spending the resources that they currently have at their disposal.

The most obvious area that requires strengthening is up front, because an injury to Van Persie doesn't bear thinking about when you consider the lack of quality strikers in our squad.

I'm sure many of you have played the game in the pub with your friends where you go through the Premiership table and pick at least one striker from each team that you would prefer to see in an Arsenal shirt instead of Park or Chamakh, and, if you haven't tried this already, then I strongly suggest you do so, because the results may just surprise you.

Here is what we came up with in about five minutes (not including obvious superstars at top clubs such as Rooney, Drogba, Suarez etc)

West Brom: Odemwingie
Aston Villa: Bent, Agbonlahor
Wolves: Doyle
Blackburn: Yakubu
Bolton: Davies, Klasnic
Newcastle: Ba
Chelsea: Anelka, Sturridge, Kalou
Manchester United: Berbatov Welbeck
Everton: Saha
Tottenham: Defoe
Norwich: Stephen Fletcher
Liverpool: Kuyt, Carroll
Manchester City: too obvious!
Wigan: Rodallega

These are just a few of the names that came up, and I'm sure that you will have a few more of your own to add to that list, but it makes you wonder why our second and third strikers are of such a low standard that we would seriously rather have someone like Kevin Davies, Rodallega or Anelka in the squad when we supposedly have a profit from the sales of Nasri and Fabregas sitting in the bank alongside the perpetually-untouched but often-cited "Transfer war chest".

You can play the same game with goalkeepers as well, and, after the shocking displays of both Flappy-handski and Mannone in Greece, one could argue that an injury to our Chesney could be as crippling to our chances of a top-four finish this season as an injury to Van Persie would be.

When Fabianski was injured against Olympiacos, I was surprised that he didn't manage to misjudge or mistime his hop on to the stretcher, as he was getting his angles wrong all night and his positional play was atrocious.

As for Mannone... his ridiculous attempt at a scissor-kick clearance, when a simple catch would have been far more appropriate, left me thinking that Chesney would still be a better option than the hapless Italian... even if he somehow broke both of his arms in some freakish weightlifting accident or something similar.

The good news for us fans is that the last time our chances of a top-four finish were in serious doubt by January, Arsène Wenger went out and bought Andrey Arshavin for big money and look how well that one turned out for us, fellow Gooners!!


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31
comments

  1. Jeff

    Dec 16, 2011, 8:17 #16009

    @CT Gooner. Please don't call me an AKB, I'm an Arsenal fan and season ticket holder of over thirty years.And I know and have said on here, that Wenger makes mistakes. Ref "thinking" You compare Beni with Na$ri. I think you'll find that Gervinho is the bench warmers replacement. And no of course Arteta cannot be compared to Cesc. However, we do look like more of a "team" Also, look at the spine (when fit) Szczesny, Vermaelen, Wilshere, RVP. Now who put that together? And who has a better spine than that in the PL? Finally my point was, if we used our energy to support the team, rather han constant negativity on here, maybe we'd be pleasantly surprised.

  2. DW Thomas

    Dec 16, 2011, 4:23 #16008

    Here's the thing that most troubles me. How can a manager with Wenger's reputation not push more for a better squad? Does he really not have the power to spend what he has to round out the team to make it the best he can? Anyone in Arsene's position should be doing all he can to leave a legacy of winners, not finish his career at Arsenal only talking of top four finishes and 14 years in the CL. Again, this I think is what angers most fans. Stop moaning about getting behind the team. They are paid very well to deal with the media, get over it, and play their hearts out doing a job they love and we all cheer with envy. Winners perform and succeed no matter who is being critical of them, fans and/or pundits. That's what sets them apart and why in all sports only one winner gets the trophy. Sooner or later I hope the players figure out it takes more than they are giving to win the league or cups and a manager who will strengthen our already quality team with the players who push it to its pinnacle once again. That means spending the money to bring the right players in to replace those world class ones we lose. Period.

  3. CT Gooner

    Dec 16, 2011, 1:02 #16007

    @ Canada. Fair response. I know we all hope not to be back in February ranting like we were in August! Not sure who I'd have to back up RVP though, as he'd just be a back up in a one striker formation. I would have loved to have had Mata playing the Fabragras role though, opps, back to August again....

  4. Mandy dodd

    Dec 16, 2011, 0:08 #16006

    That list of strikers is very uninspiring, would not touch any of them apart from a citeh player , who happens to be on 200k pw, roughly what the likes of Neymar would probably ask for, and get. Some of them are dinosaur strikers, they just would not suit our game. Park is untried, Cham , well his days could well be numbered, but if we decide we need a new forward, we can do better than that lot. We cannot buy these neymar like players easily, but wenger does create a few, in fact, quite a few over the years, maybe more than most others. he has one quite special one at the moment, with others who look to have a massive future. We have recently lost a couple of these top players, with another one injured, but yet , we look stronger than we have for a while, strange isn't it? How the season will pan out, who we will sign or lose is pure speculation at the moment. I get the feeling the club are in the process of putting a few wrongs right, they now have money and seem to want to rely less on youth, without completely abandoning this project as developing youngsters is one of wengers fortes. The keeper says the defence is being drilled by pr. the club will sign if they have to, the team are doing well and on a good run. The spine looks good, kos is becoming a revelation, arteta exceeding expectations, jack will come back soon hopefully and we have one of the best young keepers on earth. Rvp will hopefully break a very significant record. Vermaelen is brilliant end of, rambo has done great things this season, song is now one of the best in his position, theo has really upped his game, gerv has had a great start, compare and contrast with the likes of nasri and his start. Then there is ox. Injuries to backs are unfortunate i grant you. But the problem is anyone we bring in would have to be a top player, would they really want to play second fiddle to the aforementioned, unless of course players are leaving? Not sure what else the team should be doing at this very moment?

  5. Joe S.

    Dec 15, 2011, 21:00 #16004

    Judging by the inevitalbility of the comments posted above we seem to be on track for ground hog year no. 5. The club just won't make big decisions outside of selling their best. The deadwood will be aound for as long as Hill Wood,Godze and Wegner etc have a stake. Now an ambitious manager would be kicking and screaming to the media like a prima donna in order to make his point about a stingy board, however Arsene works within his means (on six million a year for himself )and gets on with things, in the knowledge that he will be out of it all give or take a season.

  6. CanadaGooner

    Dec 15, 2011, 20:02 #16003

    @CT Gooner: I dont have an issue with your comment at all. You stated your point clearly and with your logic. what bothers me are those people who come on here and offer very little in logic or commonsense other than to antagonise others. I have posted a few articles to date and i always try to highlight issues e.g. let's support the club at all times, but highlight areas where there needs to be change e.g. how arsenal approach the transfer window (and I posted an article last week as we're in Dec and the transfer window must be the main issue right now) - as opposed to ranting on here in February when the window has closed and we will obviously have to make do with the players we have - and slagging those players off in Feb, when nothing can be done, would be counter-productive I wont speak for everyone that's been labelled an AKB on this site, but I would say that some of us are simply backing ARSENAL as a club - and if Arsenal as a club includes the manager and the players we have, then so be it. We want to see arsenal do well, we wish to debate things that can be changed AT THE RIGHT TIME e.g. ahead of an upcoming transfer window, and if it sounds like criticism, so be it. But we wont join the group that just come on here and rant aimlessly and choose to remain negative regardless. If this doesnt explain my stance, then, feel free to carry on labelling me an AKB or anything else you wish

  7. CT Gooner

    Dec 15, 2011, 18:50 #16002

    I'm sorry AKB's (Mandy Dodd, Jeff & Canada Gooner), but you constantly miss the debate that we "thinking" Gooners have on forums such as this. Our back ups showed mid week that they just aren't up to it, and please don't try to suggest Arteta and Beny make up for Fabregras and Nasri. Now if you have something to add to the discussion, please do so, but "support your team" isn't doing it for anyone!

  8. CanadaGooner

    Dec 15, 2011, 17:22 #16001

    @Jeff - couldnt have put it any better! well said. And if 'Mandy Dodd' becomes our symbol of commonsense and fair, thoughtful comments on this site, so be it! What's more intriguing is the fact that a lot of the serial moaners on here were questioning why Wenger didnt sell RVP some seasons back when he was always injured. Well, serial-moaners: if he had sold RVP then, Arsenal would be just above Bolton this season. There's a measure of PATIENCE required in football and players like Diaby (and perhaps even Chamakh) shouldnt be written off - they still have age on their side. Some comments about the hefty wage bill for these young, under-performing players may not be off-the-mark, but I dont think there's a chance of keeping them if they're not being paid, as other clubs in the premiership would be only too happy to have them. Perhaps arranging loan deals for some of them to cover parts of their wages and wake 'em up (like Sturridge did at Bolton) could be an option Wenger needs to explore a little bit further. To continue fixating on players whose teams currently languish in the bottom half of the table isnt healthy (if they were any good perhaps they would help their current teams a bit more?) Let's give the current team and manager all the support we can, through the remainder of the season and hopefully with RVP staying healthy, we might get something out of this season yet. Definately better off right now than where we were a few weeks back

  9. Liam

    Dec 15, 2011, 17:22 #16000

    Kevin Davies? Really?

  10. Carlos

    Dec 15, 2011, 16:12 #15999

    Before there's any movement I think that several if not all of the wasters (Denilson, Bendtner, Almunia, Squilacci, Chamakh) have to be shifted from the wage bill. Until then there will be minor tweeking at best. Does anyone have any idea how much money that would free up interms of wages?

  11. flegly

    Dec 15, 2011, 13:01 #15998

    How wonderful it would be if we could just pick all the best players and they could play for The Arsenal and we would be the bestest team in the whole world ever. Oh we can it's called FIFA 2012 and i think you are getting it a bit mixed up with real life and the different challenges that exist in the real world. As for Yakubu, Davies, Carroll, Doyle, Anelka, Berbatov, Kalou, Defoe.......REALLY !!!

  12. Mark

    Dec 15, 2011, 12:50 #15997

    Park came with strings attached (Asian merchandising and branding) and Chamakh is french more or less. so enough said. their ability wasnt the main criteria. arsene is a business man and not as you say some total football nut like fergy or jose. he is not dont be so easily fooled ! he is a businessman, he went to japan to manage for petes sake !

  13. Jeff

    Dec 15, 2011, 11:14 #15996

    Won our CL group, 22 points out of poss 24 and still you lot moan! Jesus Christ, if we won the CL you'd still be moaning. And stop picking on Mandy Dodd. At least she SUPPORTS her team. I looked at an old Gooner from 2001 last week. Moaning about Wiltord and Bergkamp FFS. Stop creating sh*t before it happens. We're more of a team now and I for one am very optimistic about this season. Come on you Gunners.

  14. Ron

    Dec 15, 2011, 9:42 #15995

    Two points 1. Its hardly surprising he d said he'd buy Neymar. Most would. 2. Save for Defoe, i wdt want any of that list in a red shirt, esp if they had to be paid for! (im ignoring the reference to Man C of course). They would all be Silvestresque type signings!!

  15. Tony Evans

    Dec 15, 2011, 8:58 #15994

    How I would love to see some of our deadwood sold and replaced with a few of your suggestions. Not as easy as it should be because of the fat contracts they are on. I am afraid Wenger's faith in some players is misplaced and he is far too stubborn to admit it. You are underlining the point though that we do not need to spend a fortune to have some better squad players.

  16. DW Thomas

    Dec 15, 2011, 1:56 #15992

    Just read Wenger's current comments on the official site about selling Viera and Henry to gain the maximum $. Ok, so what about Fabregas? Where was your head in that deal? Sell our captain and best player for way below his worth in his early prime? Yeah, that was a good deal! And then, even more ridiculous, you don't replace him or even try. If Wenger doesn't buy, there can be no doubt the ambition of this club is not to win trophies, but be only self-sustaining. How boring. Being an Arsenal fan is loving the club through thick and thin. But the thin has gone on way too long for the size of our club and its worth. If things carry on the same for now 7 seasons, RVP will soon be gone and no one of any top quality will want to come to Arsenal. A lack of ambition beyond CL places is a recipe for mid-table mediocrity eventually. But, how long have we heard these same comments? How many have said what we all say? Why not get Torres and turn him and our beloved club around. Can you imagine an in-form Torres and RVP? With a solid defense and someone like Gotze to pair with Wilshire, we would have a top squad and be able to regularly rotate once our injured get healthy. The club need to show some intent and now.

  17. Shropshire Lad

    Dec 14, 2011, 21:52 #15991

    Nothing will happen in January. Wenger will make the same mistake as last season but this time the consequence will be not qualifying for the Champions League. He and the Board will make their policy statements and how it could not be avoided and do it all over again next season. He really is a stubborn old bugger but heigh ho we have had an interesting season so far! I look forward to reading this blog when Chesny and Sir Percy are on the treatment table by the end of February. I'm sure Mandy Dodd will somehow sugar coat the pill! The rest of us will once again mourn how tantalisingly close we could have come to actually winning something and move on to see who jumps ship next summer. Oh2oh2oh2bagooner!

  18. Naz

    Dec 14, 2011, 21:52 #15990

    Rosicky, squillaci, chamakh and arshavin are all dead weight and need to go (perhaps unfair to call rosicky dead weight, but hes not good enough for arsenal anymore). Arshavin I feel may still be magical if playing attackin mid, hes lost his pace and cant beat a man down the wing anymore, but i dont care anymore after watchin him floundering for a whole season and a half. Diaby i dont know, still feel he might produce. Wenger wont buy in january unless a real bargain presents itself... LACK OF AMBITION... lets attempt to compete not just sustain our place. This thrifty policy was supposed to be a short term thing, after the move to emirates... all too quickly you lot accept it as the norm! If you are happy with 3rd - 6th every season good for you, but Im not, I want success for AFC and the pride that it deserves. We are a big club! we are a top club! we have money (5th richest club in the world)! Arsenal deserves more than this and dont let anyone tell you different. If you want to be fourth then f*** off down the lane!!!

  19. Peter Wain

    Dec 14, 2011, 20:11 #15989

    We desparately need new signings. We need a left back a right back (please sell Djourou) a centre mid field player and two decent strikers. However I expect we will buy no one and by March the manager will be lamenting all the injuries promise to address the problem in the summer and panic buy mid-table mediocrity as he has done this year when RVP leaves.

  20. Ando

    Dec 14, 2011, 19:06 #15988

    Alas the promised land of the c/l looks too distant for next season, our persistance with potential rather than experience may have finally kicked us in the financial nuts. Perhaps this will be the catalyst we need to change direction and try and actually win something in the future, But don't tell Arsene, as he will just persist with the same old (young)same old (young).

  21. Andrew Cohen

    Dec 14, 2011, 17:47 #15985

    I saw David O Leary and Lee Dixon on Match of the Day 3 suggesting (and I paraphrase)that if Arsenal did not keep RVP that the team would implode. I'm keen to see somone call them traitors to the cause and stay fashionable.

  22. Harold

    Dec 14, 2011, 17:34 #15984

    Richie Waters- Another one that really believes that Wenger has to 'live with' club policy in sufference. For f**** sake the policy is only policy because HE decides it is. FACT ONE is that we don't spend anywhere near the amount of money we have available. FACT TWO is that our egalitarian wage policy means that our underpaid top drawer players are always looking to go, and our many overpaid but under-talented squad players don't want to leave and we can't sell them. Incredible that people still think that Wenger has had this situation forced upon him, but then again last week he was still trying to kid everyone that we're skint. We had to be financially careful a few years ago, but not anymore. Times change but Wenger won't, and we all lose out because of it.

  23. Joe Fitzpatrick

    Dec 14, 2011, 17:03 #15982

    Tom kingsbury- yes I rate Yakubu over Chamankh and Park... That's how terrible they are! Canada Gooner- we should either play Arshavin were he belongs or sell him because he doesn't want to be a wide forward. I used to defend him but I can sadly no longer ignore his or chamankh's blatant lack of effort or commitment to the club.

  24. Jekyll

    Dec 14, 2011, 16:49 #15980

    Wenger has the cash. He controls the entire player budget and chooses it spend it on high wages for young and unproven players rather than on transfers and wages for elite players. And any other club's strikers would be better as back up to RVP than Chamakh or Park. Chamakh has shown he's not up to it, to those that say Park hasn't had a chance - why do you think that is?

  25. Joe Fitzpatrick

    Dec 14, 2011, 16:42 #15978

    Oh sorry my mistake there on Stephen fletcher... Still better than Chamankh and Park though... At least he Puts a shift in!

  26. Dan h

    Dec 14, 2011, 16:37 #15977

    Newcastle took a punt on Ba & it came off fair play to them as he had failed a medical at Stoke.Johnson of Fulham also doesn't seem to start much for Fulham these days but also well versed with the treatment table!To get quality back up strikers to slot straight in when required is hard.Walcott may well be tried down the centre should the need arise would imagine with Gervinho & the Ox either side of him the pace alone would seriously trouble opponents.Interesting with regards a back up keeper Given being mentioned on here but he wouldn't of swapped sitting on City's bench for ours.Schwarzer his signing was also linked to him joining the coaching staff as part of his deal one of the main reasons why he was so keen to join.For keepers also in the PL Sorensen at Stoke or Gordon at Sunderland both out of contract soon & may be happy to be back-up's?Lets face it must be the most frustrating position at a football club.

  27. tom kingsbury

    Dec 14, 2011, 15:40 #15975

    yakubu?!!

  28. allybear

    Dec 14, 2011, 14:45 #15974

    Very good article Joe and the reason why we have second rate reserves is down to Wenger as that is his management style! Odemwingie would be a very good backup for RVP as would Bent. I said before that when Shay Given was available he should have been bought. What about the left back position now? Dont expect much to happen in January though.

  29. CanadaGooner

    Dec 14, 2011, 14:41 #15973

    Joe, with the exception of possibly Agbonlahor, Sturridge, Welbeck and Defoe (if they'll sell him cheap) I find it hard to believe anyone would see the others in an Arsenal shirt. Ok we havent won anything in 6 years, but we still have a pretty high standard. The fact that chamakh and park havent done so well this season doesnt make Odemwingie or Yakubu better options. These are players made for, and used to playing in relegation dog-fights and I think Arsenal deserves better Few months ago Arshavin was the only vocal Arsenal player urging the rest of the team on and questioning their commitment and Arsenal's ambition (I still have a clip of some of this outbursts), he's probably just thrown in the towel and Wenger can either dust him up and get him going again or sell him (same applies to some of the other players we're carrying at the moment) A few months ago when Owen Coyle was flying high with Bolton, he was being tauted as a possible England Manager or Man U or Arsenal Manager post fergie and wenger - with the same crop of players this season he's struggling: that's how quickly football can deal you a rotten lot. A lot of the players we have will most likely do well at other clubs (and were doing just fine before we bought them), but sometimes players just cant fit into a system or a club (berbatov post spurs, torres, shevchenko, crespo....). Finally, some of your information is factually incorrect and I'm sure some a few commentators will pick up on it.

  30. Richie Waters

    Dec 14, 2011, 14:36 #15972

    Its simply amazing to me when I read articles like this, surely all Gooners now know all about our clubs in house policy of self sustainment, paying any future signings wage bill only from our season ticket sales budget. If not why not? We can argue all we want about is it the correct way to procede for the club? But the fact is that policy is in place and until its changed we'll all have to live with it, Arsene Wenger too! What that means in practise is (as was seen in our buying spree) To stay within budget players have to be sold before new contracts (For wages) can be agreed. We only have 60K seats to sell each year so that is the budget for our wage bill. The rainy day treasure chest can be used to buy players but not pay their wages.

  31. MidlandBasedGoon

    Dec 14, 2011, 13:24 #15968

    When did Steve Fletcher leave Wolves to sign for Norwich? Lambert is better than I thought