Joe Mardon
The doom which follows pre-season optimism was ushered in yesterday, as the cretins of the English media wailed in delight in 'analysing' Arsenal suffering the ultimate humiliation; losing nil-nil at home on the first game of the season.
"ARSENAL plunged into crisis last night in the wake of Robin van Persie’s £22million move to Manchester United". So screamed The Sunday Sun. No, of course I don't read the rag either, but I was pointed to their opening dig and use it here to highlight the stupidity.
They continued, "New strikers Lukas Podolski and Olivier Giroud failed to impress". Write them off. Do we still have the receipts?
They weren't alone. The dinosaurs were out, roaming the summer sun kissed days with their dark age views, self justified by someone, somewhere, somehow deeming them worth paying for.
As Giroud missed the game’s best chance, Match of the Day trolled out the predictable “Arsenal fans will be thinking that is just the kind of opportunity from which Robin van Persie would have scored", institutionally naive to the fact that the Dutchman was capable of missing chances too, particularly when a yard out and three nil up against Milan.
"If you were an Arsenal fan you would be worried". Of course Gary, desperately panicky we are. It's all gone wrong. One game in, and we look envious at your old club Spurs, with their lone striker, whilst Hansen's worry ought to have been fully consumed with the laughter emanating from Liverpool.
As much as there is no reason to read The Sun, if Paddy Barclay is missing from Sky's Sunday Supplement line-up, you're better off in bed, rather than awake to the lazy, miseducated opinions of the arrogant.
"Santi Cazorla is a poor man’s Cesc Fabregas" rambled one. Santi showed enough on Saturday to excite. Whether he is better than Fabregas is a ridiculous argument without point.
Every player could be deemed worse by comparison to another. Is Fabregas a poor man’s Iniesta? Does it matter or undermine the actual talent in question?
Over the last few seasons the growing prominence of Sky's La Liga coverage has promoted the intelligent analysis of top British journalists based in Spain. When Sid Lowe and Graham Hunter talk glowingly of Cazorla, it means a damn sight more than John Richardson of the Daily Express, a p*ss poor version of superior journalists.
After the game, Arsene Wenger surprised me with his preference for playing the first game of the season away from home. Whilst it’s easy to say after firing a frustrating blank, you only have to look at the first goal Chelsea scored at Wigan yesterday to understand his point.
The hardest part of the game is to create and convert chances. That's hard enough when teams visit the E******s without any intention to score. It's harder still when the means by which you breakdown a ten man defence is not sufficiently sharp. When the new players already here are bedding in, and those on their way have not yet arrived. A ridiculous round of pointless internationals during the preceding week doesn't aid our efforts either. The better sides will still find a way to break through such barriers, and so will Arsenal in time.
In contrast, Chelsea travelled to Wigan, who were encouraged to attack by the limited home support, and promptly conceded on the counter attack within two minutes, as the gaping space they neglected to defend was exploited by Hazard finding Ivanovic.
If any of the above has been interpreted as an excuse, you wrongly assume that a draw on the opening day of the season merits one. It doesn't - and I haven't even mentioned the sweltering heat in which the game was played...
I'm merely tired of the gun-shot over reactionary nature of those who are paid to know better.
I've seen Arsenal get beaten at home on the first game of the season 4-2 against Mark Robins and Norwich City, before an admittedly poor league season saw us end by winning both domestic cups.
I've seen the fattest man to ever score a hat trick, Micky Quinn, help Coventry City destroy the latter crowned European Cup Winners’ Cup winners 3-0. Those were opening day crises, and magic was savoured from both seasons.
The flip side to such results can be found at Plough Lane, where a Champions elect Arsenal stormed to their first three points of the 1988/89 season. A romping win on the opening game of the season might well point to a successful campaign. As might the defeat United suffered at Villa Park before they went on to win the treble.
Let's finish with the Sun (preferably forever). "One thing is clear - Arsenal will NOT win the league".
Thanks for the capitalised letters, without them your point would be misunderstood.
