Cancel that order for the silver polish then

Online Ed: Spendthrift manager has lost it once and for all



Cancel that order for the silver polish then

Almunia: Nice guy, but no winner


Manuel Almunia had a decent game against Blackburn on Saturday. He’s had decent games before and he’ll have a few more yet. He will also have a few games in which his lack of ability at the level he is being asked to play will cost his team points. Remember the corner at Anfield little over two weeks ago that he flapped at and completely missed? It didn’t result in a goal, but that was more down to fortune than anything. Remember him pushing the ball into the net at Birmingham last season at a time when Arsenal were miraculously still in the title race? And we’ll always have Paris in 2006. Barcelona’s winning goal would have been prevented by a better keeper. Yes, Almunia had pulled off a blinding reaction save shortly before the interval, but his mistakes will often undo his good work.

Arsenal need a top class keeper to challenge for the two trophies Arsene Wenger thinks are worth bothering with. Wenger knows it, the board know it, the players know it and the fans know it. Opposing teams also know it. There is no doubt that the money is there and there was talk yesterday that the club had offered 14 million euros plus Almunia for Hugo Lloris, the French international shotstopper. And the attempt to secure Mark Schwarzer has been a running story for weeks.

Why did Arsenal fail to secure either? Because although they have a big club turnover and big club admission prices, they sure don’t have big club pretentions on the football field. And the manager has unquestionably developed a small club mentality when it comes to buying players. Sometimes, you just need to pay the asking price and be done with it. Manchester United don’t mess around trying to save the last penny on a transfer deal. Their target is identified, they bargain hard and they make a decision. If the price is too high they move damn quick to secure an alternative and don’t worry about counting the pennies. United have won a number of trophies since Arsenal last managed one.

Ever heard of speculating to accumulate? Wenger told shareholders in May 2009 that he would use all the resources at his disposal to improve his team’s chances of success. I am afraid that, as of September 1st 2010, that answer has to be filed under bullsh*t. Because he hasn’t. Arsenal have money in the bank and a nice guy in goal. That combination isn’t going to win you anything. Wenger will face shareholders again in a couple of weeks’ time, but this time, questions must be pre-submitted. Let’s face it, we can’t have an open exchange in which honest and frank views are expressed by those that are part-owners of the club, and hence Wenger’s employers. They might just be unfavourable and in the land of Arsene, nothing at all is wrong and the players beyond criticism. London Colney is football’s version of The Big Rock Candy Mountain.

It isn’t good enough, and sadly, when it begins to collapse, the fans will turn on Almunia, and the manager too. I have a little sympathy for the player. He is attempting to do his job as instructed by his employers, he simply isn’t quite good enough at it. But he doesn’t decide whether to buy a better replacement. He seemed to be saying his goodbyes after the Blackburn game and was conscientious to sign every autograph that was asked of him for fans waiting in the rain by the team coach. It’s just a shame that he will become the fall guy once again as Arsenal drop key points. The signing of Lloris would have made perfect sense with a French-speaking back four in front of him, and two further Frenchmen in the holding midfield positions to boot.

Instead we have an experiment that has failed too often. A keeper who is weak at set pieces and easily intimidated. Arsenal managed to keep Blackburn at bay from free kicks on Saturday with the offside trap. But corners and long throw-ins presented problems and what was required was a clear the decks keeper who will take out all and sundry as he claims the ball. Wenger’s side were a shade fortunate in the first half as Rovers missed a couple of headers that would have gone in on another day. So Almunia will be targeted and he will eventually cost points as he so often does. Arsenal will fall short again and that will make it six years without a trophy.

The bank balance, however, is looking particularly healthy. Someone has calculated the team’s net spend this summer in the transfer market as around £3 million. The equivalent of the takings for a single matchday. When you add the savings made from not paying William Gallas anymore (his wages probably equal to the combined amount being paid to the three new arrivals) then it’s a valid question to ask about the manager’s ambitions. The football will probably be good enough to keep the team in the top four, but the glass ceiling that is a consequence of the lack of squad depth in key positions won’t be broken. Maybe the quarter finals once again in Europe and the predictable exits in the domestic cups. It’s same old same old, as indeed are the weaknesses in the team, and as with every year, the manager has not addressed them fully. Presumably Fabianski comes in if Almunia gets injured. What a joke Arsenal have become. No wonder Cesc Fabregas can’t wait to get out.

But for a million or two, Mark Schwarzer could have been here in July. You have to wonder where all the money saved over the years by not buying sufficiently will end up. Will it ever be spent or is it just being siphoned off by directors using some clever accountancy techniques? Self-sufficiency is all well and good, but at least reap the rewards of what you sew. Arsenal have made serious profit over the last 12 months. If it’s all about self-sufficiency can someone give Arsene Wenger and the board an allotment to tend and hand over the decision making at the club to someone who knows what is required to win a trophy?

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Not in the mood for this, but I said I’d do it, so here are the answers to the anagrams listed at the bottom of this posting

• Hot Towel Act (Theo Walcott)
• Lulu Mania Amen (Manuel Almunia)
• Tense Blind Crank (Nicklas Bendtner)
• Cagey Chill (Gael Clichy)
• An Army Arose (Aaron Ramsey)
• A Lame Mole Beau (Emmanuel Eboue)
• Human Hack Aroma (Marouane Chamakh)
• Audio Baby (Abou Diaby)
• We Rang Serene (Arsene Wenger)
• Class Is Inequitable (Sebastien Squillaci)


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