It is said in this world where we value everyone for who they are and for whatever talents they possess, that there are various types of intelligence. This, of course, is what comes of a culture that really only values one form of intelligence, and feels it must make concessions to those that don’t possess enough of it. The intellectually superior know they are better than the rest of us, and perpetrate the conceit that we are all equally intelligent, just in different ways, thinking (correctly as it happens) that the rest of us will buy it.

Thus one can be stupid (sorry, lack logical or linguistic intelligence) yet be blessed with emotional, kinaesthetic, musical, spatial and even naturalistic and existential intelligence, amongst other types.

Footballers have kinaesthetic intelligence. They are adept with their body and their brain is able to send messages to it that enables them to perform movements and manipulate a football in such as way that, like a dancer (also kinaesthetically intelligent), they are able to entertain and impress those of us who lack that talent. We pay good money to witness this.

However, there is a hierarchy of intelligences. One needs to look no further than Professor Stephen Hawking for evidence that a lack of physical ability is no hindrance to true genius. On the other hand, kinaesthetic intelligence has very little value without at least a dash of logical intelligence, making it an inferior form of intelligence.

Picture the pitch. One team is made up of highly skilled ball players, arguably the best exponents of the quick passing game in the country. They are renowned for their flair and entertaining play. The other team is a well-organised group of fellows, not poor at all, but an average team in the division nonetheless. They are notable for the size of their men. I don’t think a single one of them is shorter than six foot three and most appear to have a few inches on this.

How then do you think the fleet-footed decide to play against these giants? That’s right, with long, high balls into the penalty area aimed at the three or so Davids in amongst the seven or eight Goliath like defenders. Now, my next question is how many times do you think they tried this tactic? The answer would be at least 25 in the second half, having succumbed to a late first half header (what else?) that mugged an indecisive ‘keeper. Finally, for your bonus points, how successful do you think this tactic turned out to be?

I’m not even going to bother answering that one.

So next time someone tells you about different types of intelligence, just remind them that those kinaesthetically intelligent footballers are actually pretty thick.