Joe Mardon
I've never felt so awkward over The Arsenal. Like disappointed parents, fans shake their heads in sad reflection at our predicament. Surprise replaced by acceptance. Some are more vocal, booing the team off at half time, calling every other player a c**t, waiting for a fellow fan to dare disagree, for then they'll become a c**t as well. Civil wars break out around the ground. Again. Fans turn their back to the game and square up to each other, ignoring a second half lined with desperation, as the players hold up their hands to admit what's gone before has been far from the minimum expected. Especially with the price increase shadowing every error. "Six percent, you're having a laugh".
Arsenal fans find voice as the stadium announcer lies to us about the attendance again. The protest walk enters the stadium and wraps around the stadium in audible patches. And Villa are still two up.
For the first time a season finishes and I'm looking forward to not having to suffer it again for a while. I'm glad I haven't got to go again this season. Sad as that sounds. Surprisingly, I found myself sticking around for the lap of apology. There were some who deserved it. Some who are as disappointed with their team mates as we are. Jack deserves praise and my applause. Van Persie too. A few others. The deadwood know who they are and must've felt uncomfortable moping around our pitch for what will hopefully be the last time.
The end of the season used to be feared, as two months of boredom crept around the corner, and the people down the park stupidly took the goals down and replaced them with cricket nets.
Arsene and the club need time to evaluate things. As fans need we need the space too. Time apart to realise what we mean to each other, before the animosity turns poisonous.
"I caught a glimpse, but it's been forgotten. So here we are, again."
There were glimpses. Fine sights that lead you to believe that the redundant balcony at the Islington Town Hall might once again be crowded by jubilation and silver. Chelsea, Barcelona and United at home. Such glimpses are hard to remember as fondly as we might as the body blows of let downs leave them all but forgotten. Apart from Barca. F**k me that was good.
Body blows. Newcastle. Four nil up and Champions-elect at half time. Battered and drawn. Carling Cup Final. Win something, ease that burden. A way was found to lose a cup final in the last minute in a fashion never seen before, and never likely to be again.
Even after such disappointments, we were let off and given chance after chance to make a claim for the league. Time and time again. Time and time again we failed. Home form disappeared. Poor goalless draws. Liverpool equalising later than late. Leads lost. Spurs. In the latter part of this season, Arsenal made you feel foolish for celebrating a goal scored, as one was never far away from being conceded.
"In a league table of results following our defeat to Birmingham, Arsenal would be thirteenth." (Info from www.twitter.com/Orbinho.) If there was a way to f*** things up this season, Arsenal were creative enough to find it, without the resilience to respond.
And we look to Arsene. It's his team. His players. His decision to cruelly continue sticking Bendtner out wide. His choice to still have Eboue at the club. His failure to adjust the home formation to 4-42 when it's clear that sides such as Blackburn and Sunderland had figured us out.
Ineffective passing, played without the belief that it was getting us anywhere. Players unable to realise who they are and what they represent.
And yet I'm still for Arsene.
Just.
The previous glories earned sufficient credit to see him through at least one more season by me. But that time is running out. Beeping, a top up urgently required.
Next season. Again.
If we arrive at May 2012 with the same failures behind us, caused by an ignorance at our shortcomings and how to fix them, the minority of voices already calling for change are likely to be joined by many more. The hope now is that Arsene's downtime is turned around before it blemishes the legacy that brought us where we are. If it isn't, it might be time to part ways.
And 'Arsene knows' that too. "Please trust this team and, trust us too add what is needed", he asked in his programme notes.
To the summer.
