"Dearly beloved, we gather here today not to praise Arsenal Football Club, but to bury it.
Painful as our loss is, the sadness is intensified in its needlessness; taken from us as victim to the wilful hands of Arsene Wenger, Ivan Gazidis and above all, Enos Stanley Kroenke.
It is right and proper that we pay our respects to family; but also let us summon the courage to pray for the dignity of those responsible, however heinous their part in the demise.
M. Wenger - none so blind as he who cannot see, perpetuating the crippling malaise developed apace over some years. Mr. Gazidis, too, subrogated any trace of credibility in the notion of competition, seduced as he was by the continual lust for profit. Judge them not harshly. Judge not Mr. Kroenke, whose overwhelming failure to muster virtue over the deadly sins of greed, gluttony and sloth has led us all inevitably into the darkness of envy of our neighbour. These poor souls bear witness to the folly of the narcissistic, and serve as a warning to us all of the dangers of wrongful idolatry. From this, we are taught that we must learn the value of truth, rationale and desire for betterment; rallying against hubris, deceit and division.
As we turn out thoughts to The Arsenal, we remember those down the years whose love was lost, not by choice, but by means of falsehood. We mourn the loss of our old place of worship, replaced as it was by promises of deliverance of The Holy Grail, which now seem but a cruel hoax. Still we await deliverance and a return of joyful songs and praise, lavished upon those deserving; but the dark forces have overcome us and daily we are awoken by the cockerel's crow.
Tearfully, we remember those brave leaders who represented our true heritage. Now surely would they turn their faces away and weep, blessed as we were by men of vision. They were warriors who fought to the end, now too few in number. Latterly, they saw the future and forewarned us, but we stood helpless, waiting for intervention which, though promised, did not transpire. Instead, The Arsenal slowly withered, its health ailing from brain, then spine and heart.
In its prime, we fondly recall happier times. The apparently miraculous era of The Invincibles, who but one rose above mortal men. We recall triumphs against great adversity, even at the death, on soil both near and far from our land. Now we recite achievements meriting timeless lore; as legends were made in glorifying the very essence of Victoria Concordia Crescit. Now silenced, listless…still.
There are those who still believe, roundly mocked and chastised for their devotion. Yet faith cannot be blind; we must challenge our values and beliefs and in doing so, garner strength in the collective. They say that the night is darkest before the dawn; but there is no light to guide us and so we wander, aimless and forlorn whilst our enemies rejoice.
Cherish the memory of Arsenal Football Club, as we offer our final respects. Do not be fooled by denial, for it has thrived too long and deceived too many. Better to acknowledge the power of temptation, besetting our unholy trinity, who failed in their duty and were devoid of mental strength in its true form - offering only prescribed rhetoric, without substance.
What lessons can we learn? In our despair, no prophet's soothsay was heeded. Even as the end drew near and wrath unleashed, their pride was not cowed. How then to charge ourselves? A simple man believes anything, but a prudent man gives thoughts to his steps. When the result of blind faith is nought, then the remedy is to think and challenge preconceptions.
Be humble in expectation. Remember the joy, but accept its passing. Make not comparisons which do not bear the making. In doing so, we can honour Arsenal Football Club, though it flourishes no more. Know that whoever knows the right thing to do and fails to do it, for him it is sin… and forgive… if you can."