“The more you practice, the luckier you get.” That must surely be the best sporting one-liner of all time, first said by South African golfer Gary Player in response to a comment that a brilliant bunker shot was just pure luck.

I don’t think that there is an equivalent one-liner to demonstrate bad luck but maybe Arsenal fans should invent one as our luck this season has been crap to say the least. I think Arsene, Keef or someone at the club must have walked under a ladder before running over a black cat on Friday the 13th.

First and foremost is the injury suffered by Eduardo, two minutes into a match when a win would have taken us eight points clear. One second either way and Eddie would have been able to add several more goals to the 12 he had already bagged. Bad luck rating = 10/10.

In the four league games that followed St Andrews we conceded two offside goals and one own goal whilst collecting only three points from a possible 12. In the eight games before St Andrews we had collected 20 points from a possible 24. If we had won just two of our drawn matches, we would now be going into the last two games of an arduous season on level points with the top two, each of whom will also have a very large eye on resting players for Moscow. Bad luck rating = 9/10. Exasperation rating = 11/10.

Against Liverpool at home we had a stonewall penalty turned down by the referee Mr D Blunkett. One week later we scored first at Old Trafford before conceding a penalty and a soft free kick, after which we lost 2-1. Bad luck rating 7/10.

Injuries this season – Eduardo, Sagna, Toure, Flamini, Fabregas, Rosick-note, Van Persie, Walcott, Denilson and Diaby have all missed several matches. Injuries are part and parcel of football but I swear we’ve been cursed this year. Bad luck rating = 9/10.

Cup draws are a game of pure chance but even here our luck has been poor. In six draws in the two domestic cup competitions we were drawn away on four occasions, each time having to travel oop north, including a fourth draw in six seasons against Man Utd. Bad luck rating = 6/10.

Chequebooks:- Arsene mislaid his sometime in early January. To compound matters Keef had maxed out his Platinum (Diamond encrusted) AmEx card on teeth whitening and fake tan so it couldn’t be used for squad strengthening. Bad luck rating 9/10.

In Europe we drew the CL holders before the stunning piece of bad fortune that was the quarter final draw. Moan U and the Nouveaux Riche w**kers from Fulham both drew comparatively weak teams with the home leg last on both occasions whilst we would have had to beat the other three members of the English Top four to lift the trophy. Bad luck rating = 8/10.

During the two legged quarter final another penalty decision went against us (Kuyt’s Dad was the ref if memory serves me well!) before conceding a soft penalty just after going ahead on away goals (Torres’ Dad was the ref if memory serves me well!). Chelsea of course were gifted a 95th minute own goal at Anfield. Bad luck rating 8½/10.

And finally – Alex Hleb gets a three match ban for a bitch-slap that would have embarrassed Dale Winton! I hope he doesn’t use his enforced lay-off to think about a move to Serie A (Hleb – not Winton) Bad luck rating 3/10.

So there we have it, more bad luck than Gary Glitter’s barber!! Am I paranoid? Almost certainly but I don’t remember another season throwing quite so many hurdles in our way. Roll on August.